Dealing with the Chaos of Motherhood--Wellofaith.com

Making the Best Life for Your Family: Embrace “Mediocrity”. #LifeHack

Making the Best Life for Your Family: Embrace Mediocrity. #lifehack

Pinterest Perfect Life Doesn’t Mean Best Life

Pinterest is one of those sites designed (in theory) to make life easier for people.

Making the Best Life for Your Family: Embrace Mediocrity--wellofaith.com
My baby girl’s third birthday. Homemade cupcakes and buttercream frosting that didn’t set well because it was too hot.

What I’ve noticed instead, is that it often just makes us busy moms, struggling to give the best life to our children, feel guilty for not giving the little ones Pinterest worthy birthday parties, meals, craft projects, or homeschool assignments.

Feelings of inadequacy do not help us live our best lives, or teach our children what is actually important in life.

You know, actually living it.

Those home-cooked meals you’ve made may not look like the stylized photographs you’ve found on that favorite pinning site, but they’ve filled those empty bellies. They’ve provided needed nourishment to growing minds and bodies.

Related: Sare’s Favorite Quick and Delicious Ramen Soup Recipe

Sometimes they’ve even tasted pretty good.

That family birthday party with a slightly lopsided, mostly homemade cake, may not have all the razzle-dazzle or high price tag, but it was still filled with love. Also, who says a cake has to be perfect to taste delicious?

I won’t even get into craft projects. Being real here–I hate arts and crafts. They cause me so much anxiety, and could take an entire post just explaining the whys of that.

As for homeschool assignments repeat after me: Less is more.

So step away from the site of “perfect” and give yourself grace.

Dust Bunnies Aren’t a Sign of A Bad Life

We’ve all seen them, those wispy balls of fluff floating across our floors or huddled in the corners of rooms.

Dust bunnies.

Even for someone who vacuums every day (when you have a dog shedding all the time, and a crawler, vacuuming every day IS the answer), dust bunnies can be a reminder of how imperfect our housekeeping is.

It’s taken a long time for me to accept this next part, and I still have to battle with myself over it from time to time.

Your House Doesn’t Have to be Perfect.

In fact, your family can be living the absolute best life; surrounded by dust bunnies, a sink full of dishes, and peeling paint.

I spent years (yes, years!) of my life stressing out about the cleanliness of my home.

Whenever anyone visited I was positive they were judging me based on the mismatched furniture or the sparsely decorated walls.

Making the Best Life for Your Family: Embrace Mediocrity--wellofaith.com
Not actually my kitchen, because I forgot to take a picture of my sink before I washed the dishes. Again.

Not to mention the dog hair that had once again appeared on the rug in the center of the room.

It’s only been since my youngest was born, that I started to let go of that particular stress-inducer.

Something had to give, and it wasn’t going to be the baby snuggles.

As it turns out, a happy home doesn’t have to look like Martha Stewart decorated it, or that a personal maid cleans it.

Don’t Focus Too Much On Appearance

Appearance isn’t everything.

In an age where society is so caught up in what the one-percenters are doing, it might seem like the way things appear are actually the way things are.

That’s not the truth.

The truth is that some of the happiest people are living lives that appear to be lacking.

They aren’t driving fancy cars, carrying expensive cell-phones, or sporting the latest fashions.

In some cases the happiest people, the people living the best lives they can, are barely scraping by.

So how could they possibly be happy? How could their lives be considered good?

They’re Actually Living

Without all the trappings the world has decided people need, truly happy people get to enjoy the life they’re living. They focus on their loved ones; making memories, working together, sharing struggles and successes, supporting one another.

They’re not worried about posting perfect pictures on social media, or selling people on the idea that a particular product will bring instant happiness.

Making the Best Life for Your Family: Embrace Mediocrity--wellofaith.com
Notice the lack of decor, and the abundance of leaves on my steps?

No, the people who are living life most likely are chasing around a toddler with a runny nose, praising God for providing food for the table, and tripping over a child’s toy while listening to someone demand that their sibling stop looking at them.

They might even be burning dinner, because they forgot to set the timer.

Those people aren’t likely staging a beautiful scene with white furniture and impressionist artwork.

That impossibly perfect living room.

The thought alone boggles my mind.

Though, they might be studying the new crayon drawing their budding artist drew in the stairwell.

Again.

The Perfect Life Requires Embracing Mediocrity

Now, don’t get me wrong here. I’m not saying to go all in on a mediocre life. Don’t sit around in filth, or give up your dreams.

What I am saying is it’s okay to not do everything perfectly.

Embrace mediocrity in dinner making (unless you’re a gourmet chef, then that’s another story).

Embrace mediocrity in house keeping. Those dust bunnies won’t rule the world, but the children you’re raising might change the future of our world. A clean house can happen after those precious gifts from God have moved out. Then you might even be able to afford a maid (you know, once you’re no longer feeding the hungry masses known as your children).

Related: How to Calm the Chaos of Motherhood

Embrace mediocrity in material possessions. Things don’t really bring us happiness. Memories, laughter, and the hugs from our loved ones do. This might look like you not working 90-hour weeks, because you feel like you need to ‘show’ that you’re successful. Or it might look like putting away your screen and connecting with those around you.

Related: Unstuffed Decluttering Your Home, Mind and Soul–Ruth Soukup

No one, since Jesus, has been perfect.

We’re all just trying to make the best of it until we go to our forever home.

So really make the best of it. Really live life. Stop worrying about how your life looks to others, and start embracing the way your life really is.

The messiness, the dust bunnies, the imperfectness.

That’s what living the best life really means.

Until next time,

wellofaith

This article includes affiliate links. If you purchase an item using a link, I will receive a percentage at no additional cost to you.

Making the Best Life for Your Family: Embrace Mediocrity--wellofaith.com
Delicious and Easy Ramen Soup--Wellofaith.com

Sare’s Favorite Delicious and Quick Ramen Soup Recipe

Sare’s Favorite Delicious and Quick Ramen Soup Recipe

Quick and Easy Ramen Recipe

This post contains affiliate links.

Ever since I was little I’ve loved the cheap and unhealthy classic Top Ramen.

For a few years in my twenties it was pretty much the only thing I ate other than deep fried bar food, and the ocassional home-cooked meal I’d get at my childhood home.

Luckily, since that time I’ve learned a few things about eating and cooking, and this recipe is guaranteed to feed the otherwise unhealthy craving.

Ingredients

Sare's Favorite Delicious and Quick Ramen Recipe--wellofaith.com
  • Six (6) to eight (8) cups organic bone (or vegatable) broth
  • 1 onion sliced
  • 3 (or more) cloves of garlic chopped
  • 3 cups Frozen vegatables of your choice
  • Meat, Tofu, or seafood of choice (I love shrimp in this dish)
  • 1 package Japanese Somen Noodles
  • Pink Himalayan Salt to taste
  • Ground black pepper to taste
  • Approximately 2 teaspoons chili powder
  • Molasses (I used a couple tablespoons, but you can add more or less)
  • Coconut Aminos

Quick Recipe Directions

Delicious and Easy Ramen Soup--Wellofaith.com

Begin by sauteing the onion until translucent. I like to do this with either ghee or butter.

Remember, fat is not the enemy, and it tastes so good.

Add garlic and brown for an additonal two minutes.

Once the onion and garlic have been combined, add broth.

This is when I begin adding the seasonings (salt, pepper, chili powder).

Experiment with herbs and spices you have on hand to get a deeper flavor.

When the broth comes to a boil, add molasses, stirring to combine.

Add frozen vegatables to the flavored broth.

In a separate pot, make noodles–following package directions. The package I used called for the noodles to be drained and rinsed, then added to the hot broth. This took approximately five (5) minutes.

Combine with vegatables and broth. Top with meat of choice and sprinkle with Coconut Aminos.

Anytime is a Good Time for Soup

We’ve had several storms throughout this summer, and even though it was in the high 80s the last time I made this recipe, the howling wind, crashing thunder, and torential rain called for soup.

Besides, we have air conditioning so it wasn’t exactly the Mojave Desert inside our little cottage.

When I say this is a quick recipe, it really is.

I was able to get this soup onto the table, before the power went out, and was washing up the last of the dishes as the lighting and thunder circled around our house.

Did I mention storms like to hover over our house?

I hope you and your family enjoy this recipe as much as my family does.

Until next time,

wellofaith

P.S. Have you tried my favorite muffin recipe yet? If not, you can find it here.

Sare's Favorite Delicious and Quick Ramen Soup Recipe
scripture prayer for moms--wellofaith.com

Scripture Prayer for Moms–Sunday August 11, 2019 With Printable 3×5 Scripture Art

Scripture Prayer for Moms Sunday August 11, 2019

Why A Prayer For Moms?

As a mom, I find myself struggling to be the right kind of role model for my children.

scripture prayer for moms

This is especially true on Sunday mornings as we’re preparing to leave the house for worship.

I’ve discovered in our family, that Sunday mornings are the most stressful for us.

With six people needing to eat and get ready (and one of them coming home from work not long before we need to be pulling out of the driveway), our home is not a haven of peace and tranquility.

To be honest, as we pull out of the drive, I more often than not, have my crabby pants on and spend the fifteen minute drive praying for compassion, grace, and understanding.

I would rather be singing praise music, or chatting with my family, than needing to apologize to each child for my anxiousness and irritability.

To that end, I’ve decided I need a focused plan for keeping more connected to God before joining in fellowship with others at church.

What better way than a prayer from Scripture to return my focus to the One who is in control. Who knows me deeply.

With that in mind, I thought that if I have this struggle, certainly someone else struggles with it too. So, I’m sharing the scripture and the prayer for moms who feel frazzled and out of control.

I pray this will help you this Sunday morning.

You’re not alone, Momma’s.

Scripture Prayer for Moms--wellofaith.com

Something to Pray

Let the morning bring me word of Your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in You. Show me the way I should go, for to You I entrust my life.

Psalm 143:8 NIV

Heavenly Father,

This morning while I balance breakfast dishes with dressing babies, let me be reminded of Your unfailing love.

Fill me with wisdom and peace; showing me the way I should go.

My life is Yours, LORD, and I trust in You.

In Your glorious name,

Amen

scripture prayer for moms--wellofaith.com

For a printable 3×5 of the scripture, click here.

Until next time,

wellofaith
scripture prayer for moms
The Power of a Praying Spouse--WellOFaith

To the Mother Who Struggles with Patience You’re Not Alone

To the Mother Who Struggles

with Patience

You’re Not Alone

Just a Mother Looking for Patience

It’s raining outside, the kids are crowding around you in a two foot space, fighting each other for your attention. Each one louder than their sibling beside them; the noise is deafening, and frustration pulses inside you.

When the three year old asks you the same question for the fifteenth time in as many minutes, your patience snaps and angry word vomit pours out of your mouth.

Sound familiar?

Well, Momma, I’m proof you’re not alone.

I’ve struggled my entire life with patience, and it got worse as I got older.

Having Four Children, Three of Them Under Six, Hasn’t Magically Morphed Me Into Mary Poppins Either.

If anything, motherhood seems to have pushed me even further into territory more fitting of Batman than a loving Christian mother.

There are many (many!) days when I temporarily lose sight of who I am; forgetting I’m a mother in her late 30s, and not a drill sergeant (or some dark hero).

Instead of lovingly listening to each of my children as they inform me, once again, of the horrible atrosities their siblings were part of–generally looking at them while they were eating, or in some cases NOT looking at them– I find my patience disappear like a bird flying south for the winter.

Our children need love, guidance, and correction.

As parents we know this.

We also know they’re supposed to receive those things without running for the nearest fallout shelter.

The trick is figuring out how to continually show how much we love our children, even when we’re so perfectly imperfect we end up on the razor-edge each time these little people don’t act like robots.

I Grew Up in a Home Full of Anger, Resentment, and Yelling. Not Patience.

While my parents weren’t drill sergeants, they also weren’t compassionate. Discipline often came loudly and with words of condemnation.

My children deserve better than that, and so do yours.

The question we need to ask ourselves is:

How Can We Love Our Children Better?

Since we’re not likely going to become patient parents overnight, we need to give ourselves some grace.

Forgive yourself when you mess up.

We also need to give our children grace.

Did you get that?

Our children need grace too.

Just like we do.

Show Children Grace

I’ve been blessed with these children.

They’re mine, but only temporarily. I only have so many years with them before they leave to follow whatever path God has laid out for them.

Those moments when my son steals the peanut butter and hides in his room to eat it, should be handled in such a way that he knows he isn’t being sent to the Gulag; that he hasn’t damaged his relationship with his parents.

Grace.

I should show grace, because God has shown me grace again, and again.

Sadly, knowing I should show grace, and actually showing grace are two vastly different things.

In the heat of the moment, when I’ve just discovered the peanut butter smeared all over the carpet, as well as his face, it is often a very worldly response that comes out instead of the words of love and compassion.

God Shows Me Compassion…Again

Mom guilt is a real thing, y’all. It shouldn’t be, but it is. That isn’t God, that’s the world. He has already forgiven me for not handling that episode correctly. He has already moved on.

Whatever struggle you’re going through with your children, God’s been there. When you act like the world and not like Christ, God forgives you.

It’s time that we learn to forgive ourselves and move on.

If you didn’t show your child grace, apologize. Show them you’re human and flawed; that you make mistakes and bad choices too.

Then move on.

Patience is hard won, but grace can shorten the battle.

With prayers for you, Fellow Momma.

Until next time,

wellofaith
To the Mother Who Struggles with Patience You're Not Alone--wellofaith.com
parenting love

That Time As A Teen When I Was A Perfect Parent

I once was a perfect parent. Before I had children of my own.
When I was a Perfect Parent

I Was a Perfect Parent

As a teenager, one who obviously knew everything about everything, I believed I would be a certain way as an adult. I was one of those people who believed I knew how to handle whatever life had in store for me. This included parenting.

*Insert slightly insane laughter here*

There is a meme floating around the internet that states: “I was a perfect parent. Then I had children.”

It would be funny if it weren’t so incredibly accurate.

Too many people (me included) believe they’ve got it all figured out–life, fitness, parenting, their make-up; only to have reality kick them solidly in the solar plexus.

My old friend, Reality likes to remind me of its presence regularly.

When I was still a perfect parent–living under my parents’ roof, wearing clothes they bought for me, talking on the phone (a landline!) they paid for; I swore I would never treat my children the way my parents treated me.

I wouldn’t keep my children from doing what they wanted, make them do chores, or tell them no. I would be different. I’d understand them, and treat them with “respect”.

I’m sure God chuckled at my plans.

My parents did.

When I was still a perfect parent--living under my parents' roof, wearing clothes they bought for me, talking on the phone (a landline!) they paid for; I swore I would never treat my children the way my parents treated me. I wouldn't keep my children from doing what they wanted, make them do chores, or tell them no. I would be different. I'd understand them, and treat them with

The Reality Of Parenting Is Drastically Different

Before the birth of my youngest daughter, my niece and I spent some time sitting on a bench overlooking the Puget Sound.

The sun was warm, the sky was clear, the seagulls were begging scraps of our lunches. It was a much-needed break from the hustle and bustle we’d been dealing with for the last few months.

Taking a few moments to enjoy the beauty the Lord created, and to truly appreciate it, helped relax my anxious heart.

It also helped me understand something about myself:

I’m not a perfect parent, and I don’t really have this parenting thing down.

In fact, teen me would spend a lot of time rolling her eyes at adult me.

I always thought my parents were strict, but they were nothing compared to how I am as a parent.

Part of this stems from a moderate battle with anxiety, but not all of it.

Simply put, my priorities have changed, as have my views.

God is the Perfect Parent

God has blessed us with four beautiful children, not to be perfect parents, but to teach them and train them up in what is righteous.

Much to their dismay, that includes horrors like sweeping, making their beds, cleaning bathrooms, and picking up toys.

It also requires them to spend time with us, to not put their friends above the LORD or their family, and to forgive each other when we stumble.

Something else that comes along with this is the amount of freedom we allow our children to have.

Our eldest is only eleven, and regardless of how my husband and I were raised the world is a much different place today than it was twenty years ago.

Yes, she can do solitary things without constant supervision, and she has experienced the joy of middle school ministry events (where her mother wasn’t invovled), but there are rules that have to be followed, and consequences if those rules are ignored.

This is a relatively new freedom for her, and I still have several bad moments where I want to keep her in the house away from any chance of getting hit by a speeding car or abducted (see, anxiety).

I’m taking it a day at a time, and maybe I’ll be more relaxed when they’re visiting me in the retirement home.

The point is, there are no perfect parents on Earth, except God, and of course those who have never had children.

We as a society (especially women) spend so much time judging the merits of one person over another that we seem to forget we’re all just stumbling along doing the best we can.

Have some people lost their way?

Yes, but that isn’t for us to judge.

There are people in this world who have been called to help those who have fallen.

Instead of casting blame and pointing fingers, it’s time for us to come together and build each other up, and to raise our own children with love, compassion, and grace.

Six Things I Learned When I Quit Facebook

Six Things I Learned When I Quit Facebook

“Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable–if anything is excellent or praiseworthy–think about such things. Whatever you have learned or recieved or heard from me, or seen in me–put it into practice. And the God of Peace will be with you.”

–Philippians 4:8-9

 

6-things-i-learned_pinthis-well-ofaith-01.jpeg.jpeg
This post contains affiliate links. See here for full disclosures.
When I discovered Facebook almost a decade ago, I never imagined it would be something that took on a life of its own. I sure didn’t expect that a social media platform would be something that could ever require the need of a hiatus.
Then one day, not long before the election, I realized I was in desperate need of cleansing myself from the constant updates, notifications, and interactions. During the four(ish) months I was away I learned a lot about myself, and the effect Facebook has on me. Here are six of them:

Facebook Can Bring Out the Worst in People

For every positive post on my feed, I found five negative ones. During the months leading up to the election even those people I counted on for encouragement and a Christian perspective suddenly posted less lighthearted and loving messages in favor of angry, judgemental, political posts.
This negativity while not directed at me, was still affecting my own spirit. There was so much darkness that it started to permeate every part of my day.

Facebook Worsens My Anxiety

Since I have already been dealing with heightened anxiety since the birth of my youngest, it doesn’t take much to push my anxious feelings to another level. Reading all the negative and hateful posts had me in a constant state of anxiety. I was having trouble sleeping–worrying about people I didn’t even know, and things I had no control over.
Six Things I Learned When I Quit Facebook __Well O' Faith

I could give my personal worries over to God, but for some reason, the worries of the Facebook world were never given to Him.

Facebook Made Me Less Social

Given the negativity and anxiety Facebook was bringing to me, I guess it shouldn’t come as too much of a surprise that it led me to avoid most physical interaction with friends and relatives.

With depression and anxiety comes a desire to be alone–or at least the belief you want to be alone.

After being bombarded by the cares, worries, and desires of those people on Facebook, I couldn’t afford to expend the energy on anyone else. Not even on myself.

I also fell into the false sense that I could be just as social through Messenger as I could in the physical company of a friend.

Though, to be honest, some of my nearest and dearest friends live too far away for me to sit in their presence; in that case Messenger has been a wonderful tool.

Without Facebook I Could Focus

During those months without Facebook, I found a focus I hadn’t had in years. I had removed the Facebook App from my Android devices, and without the ease of single touch, I no longer felt the overwhelming need to check-in several times (or more) a day.

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It was too much effort to actually have to go through the website.

Much to my husband’s surprise I could actually make it through a movie or a show without my attention drifting to my phone. In many cases, my phone wasn’t even with me– a wonderful side-effect for both of us.

I Was Present With My Family

Without Facebook (or my phone) taking my attention away, my family and I had the chance to make more memories. True, they aren’t photographed or chronicled on Facebook, but during those times we were one-hundred percent together.

6-things-i-learned_present-well-o-faith.jpeg.jpeg

I experienced so much joy watching my children grow and change; snuggling with them as we read books, laughing together over the antics of characters in movies, and discussing whatever was important to them. Being able to focus on them without reaching for my phone was by far the greatest blessing I experienced.

I Had So Much “Free” Time

For the first time in too long, I finally had time. I wasn’t rushed, and if I wondered where the day had gone it had nothing to do with getting sucked into social media.

I read books.

Not just a chapter or two here and there, but actual books. Instead of being glued to Facebook, I was able to lose myself in the worlds of great writers and storytellers.

I earned a well-deserved “book hangover” from Killing Patton; and enjoyed an impromptu book club with my eldest as we read and discussed The Girl Who Drank the Moon.

I was creative.

Crocheted blankets, booties, hats, and washcloths were started and finished. And each Tuesday a friend came over and we enjoyed an hour of chatting and crocheting.

I spent time with the LORD.

Six Things I Learned__Time with God-- Well O' Faith

Without Facebook calling my name, losing myself in the Word became easier. I had time to not only read a verse or two, but could actually carve out time to dive deeper into books of the Bible I’d been neglecting.

Finding Balance With Social Media

I’ve slowly began to re-enter the world of Facebook. I still haven’t replaced the app on my phone (and I’m not planning on it).

There is so much joy and living to do outside of social media, that I don’t want to find myself suddenly trapped in old habits again.

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I know there is a balance needed, especially as a blogger, and I’ve learned valuable things about myself these past few months. There is a place in my life for Facebook and other social media platforms, but they no longer have the pull on me they once had.

It’s a brave new world out here, folks.

One where I’m not controlled by social media.

One where it is controlled by me.

Have you needed to detox from social media before? What changed for you? How long did you do it for? I’d love to know.

Blessings,

Sare Signature

10 Books to Read for Personal Growth in 2017

This post contains affiliate links. See our full disclosure here.

A List of 10 Books for Personal Growth in 2017

 

Each year I compile a stack of books–some paper, some digital– to help me grow as a person. This year I’m particularly excited about my choices. I’m also honest enough with myself to know I might not get through them all. However, I thought I’d share them (in no particular order) with you. Maybe you’ll find a few new additions for your own “to-be-read” pile.

The List

This isn’t an exhaustive list, and I’ve been known to add more books to the pile as they catch my eye; my husband spends a lot of time fretting over the lack of space we have and my never ending fascination with having my own library.

What are some books you have on your reading list for 2017? Please share them in the comments.

How Patience Helps Us Grow



Each morning as we sit around the breakfast table we do a devotional as a family. Once in a while the topic will spur deeper discussion with my nine-year-old daughter; usually she remains silent while she drinks her milk and stares at me as if I just asked her when she was leaving for the moon.

This morning, the topic was patience, something I’ve never been particularly good with. I’m more of an instant gratification person. Of course, three children later, instant gratification seems more like a fairy tale, and patience is still something I’m struggling with.

Often I wonder what lesson the LORD is teaching me on the (many) days my children conspire to make me crazy. I assume it is patience, but until today, I didn’t truly understand what that meant in a spiritual, Christ-centered way.

We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they are good for us–they help us learn to endure. And endurance develops strength of character in us, character strengthens our confident expectation of salvation. And this expectation will not disappoint us. For we know how dearly God loves us, because He has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with His love.

Romans 5:3-5

It’s such a wonderful feeling to know how much God loves us, even when we aren’t patient. The Bible is always here to help; to remind us to rejoice even when we’re struggling, because we have the Holy Spirit, and it continually fills us with His love.

Blessings,

Sare

tea balls loose tea

What I Remember: Tea with My Father [A Happy Memory]

What I Remember: Tea With My Father

Memories on My Father’s Birthday

 

Today is my father’s birthday.

He’s no longer here to celebrate it, but each year on this day, I still say a prayer and send him a wish.

It’s quiet, and it’s ours.

My whole adult life, my father was my closest friend. Even when I made mistakes, I knew I could talk about them to him. 

As an adult I never felt judged by him.

It wasn’t always like that. 

Teenage Sare was an angry, bitter girl. I resented my father for working all the time and no longer being around to play buffer between my mother and me.

I missed him joining my NJROTC drill teams on our trips, and being home with me in the evenings for dinner. I’d become a latchkey kid.

Not everything was bad though.

I can look back now and see the good things that happened during those years. 

The Past Can Be Sweet

When I was in junior high and high school, my father and I would get up early in the morning, before either of us had to leave for the day, and we’d drink Irish Breakfast tea in the quiet kitchen.

Living in the PNW meant waking up to complete darkness and rain streaking the windows. Tea was a perfect accessory to strengthen our resolve to leave the house. 

Especially on those really early mornings in high school when I had zero hour swimming. I was definitely not a morning person as a teen.

tea_hot_hands
Even today I enjoy Irish Breakfast Tea

Drinking tea together was a calming ritual that made even the worst days a little easier to deal with.

That short amount of time was always a wonderful experience. 

The pang of my father’s absence still lingers in my heart; sometimes more poignant than others.

This morning was one of those moments where sweet memories I hadn’t thought of in years flooded my heart. I found it fitting that they came to me while spending time with my Heavenly Father, and drinking my morning cup of Irish Breakfast tea.

Memories Help Us Grow

Though my father is no longer physically with me, and we haven’t shared the early silence of a rain-soaked morning since I graduated from high school, those moments led to the moment I had this morning.

Everything we experience in life leaves a mark on us, whether good or bad.

These experiences with my father leave me with the desire to make similar memories with my children.

Remember today to embrace the good moments, even amid the chaos and pain of living life in this fallen world.

God doesn’t promise it will be easy, but He does promise it will be worth it.

Until next time,

 

 

wellofaith
What I Remember: Tea with My Father--wellofaith.com

Why I’m Not a Perfect Mom

Photo Credit: Pinterest (Unknown)
Photo Credit: Pinterest (Unknown)

There are many reasons why I’m not a perfect mom, and why I won’t hold out hope that someday I’ll suddenly become that mother who ‘does it all’. You know the kind of mother portrayed in Leave it to Beaver. Perfectly dressed, make-up on, and not a hair out of place. The house would always be neat and orderly, the kiddos would always be polite and presentable, and I’d be excited to host dinner parties for my husband’s business associates. This of course would all come after I made three course meals for my children and made sure they were involved in all the right social circles.

I’m honest enough and realistic enough to know that won’t happen. Not only am I more comfortable in a pair of yoga pants than I’ve ever been in a dress and make-up, my hair tends to remain in a messy knot on my head. I don’t like the feel of it on my neck and I don’t have the patience to create some intricate style that wouldn’t stay in place while I chased my eighteen month old son around or snuggled with my seven year old daughter.

As for dinner parties, those are so not going to happen. I’m almost positive God’s plan for me doesn’t include being a society maven. My idea of a party is snuggling under a blanket in my pajamas, reading a good book and drinking tea.

There have been times in recent years when I’ve wished I were designed for perfection. Where I wish I didn’t have my quirks. In those moments I spent too much time cataloging the reasons I am not a perfect mom.

I’m not a perfect mom, because I’m a perfectionist. I’m very ‘type A’ when it comes to the completion of anything. From projects to keeping the house organized. I often feel sorry for my daughter (and eventually my son), because I’m the mother that requires rooms to be neat and toys to be returned to their proper place when they’re not in use. The house is not a bounce house designed for jumping and screaming, and there is no playing outside without supervision–regardless of what the neighbor kids get to do.

I’m not a perfect mom, because I am an introvert. My perfect home would be far away from neighbors, have a lot of land for my children to play on, and have a fence to keep people away. Now, I’m not saying I’m completely a hermit, but the ability is there. Whenever I’m around people I seem to internalize their emotions and their energy. It takes me days to recuperate after any social event. My daughter on the other hand is an extrovert. She loves people, and going and doing. She very rarely needs time to recharge away from people, and is happier when she has social interaction all the time.

I’m not a perfect mom, because I am hormonal. I suffer from Seasonal Affective Disorder, and that means living in a state where people forget what the sun is makes me melancholy and irritable.

I am not a perfect mom, but I also know that’s okay. I know that the LORD has a plan for me, and that he’s in control. He knows what I need, even if I don’t.

I’m not a perfect mom, but  each day I strive to be a better mom than I was the day before. Each morning I pray for strength, wisdom, and guidance. I pray for help navigating the path of parenthood. I pray for understanding and that my children and I will grow together in our faith.

I’m not a perfect mom, but I am a forgiven mom. I am a saved mom, and I am a faithful mom. Every day may not go the way I hope it will, but it goes the way it needs to go. Each day I learn something new.

Each and every day I try to be a little less of a perfectionist. I make the effort to get my daughter into social situations so that she can thrive. I do what I can to control my hormones, and to control my mood. The point is, I’m not perfect, but I’m me. I’m following God, and doing what I can for my children.

“As for God, His way is perfect: The LORD’s word is flawless; He shields all who take refuge in Him.” Psalm 18:30

May the LORD bless you,

Sare