Marriage: 5 Frugal and Simple Ways to Date Your Spouse
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Why It’s Important to Date Your Spouse
According to Christine Hammond, a counselor who has personally worked with over a thousand couples, it’s important to date your spouse because:
In the beginning, the reason for dating is to get to know someone better to see if this is a good fit. After marriage, the reason for dating to know your spouse better to ensure a good fit. The best explanation I’ve heard is that dating prior to marriage is the equivalent of an elementary education of a person. The education should not stop there. Rather, it should be just beginning with a desire to have a Ph.D. level of understanding of your spouse.
With this in mind, it is important to make time to be a couple again; to take off the “mom” hat and take time to embrace the role of woman and wife.
Finding Time to Date Your Spouse
Between over-time hours and commuting (my husband), and children’s activities, keeping up with the house, and homeschooling (me), dating my spouse rarely happens in our family.
I’m aware of the damage this can cause, and I’m working to remedy my tendency to focus on tasks instead of on building a lasting relationship with my husband.
Knowing I need to make time for this important aspect of married life, I’ve been considering how to “find” the time.
What it comes down to isn’t that I need to “find” the time.
I need to use the time I already have. I must decide that stoking the fire in our relationship is more important than folding another load of laundry, or even taking a shower.
Although, I think being clean might be a bit more of an aphrodisiac than limp hair and baggy shirts covered in baby snot and dog fur.
I could be wrong, but I doubt it.
Step Away From Social Media
If you’re like me, I can lose track of time scrolling through social media.
I’ve cut my social media consumption way back, but that doesn’t mean that I’m not using up perfectly good “date” time by wiling away uncounted minutes looking at Instagram posts.
Skip Your Workout
I’m not saying fitness is a waste of time (it’s not), but if you’re having a hard time “finding time” to connect with your other half, skipping it one day a week won’t destroy your hard work or set you back.
After all, being healthy is more than just having muscles and visible abs.
Put a Movie on For the Kids
I’ll preface this with saying: I’m not a proponent of children watching television.
Do mine watch TV?
Does it make me want to toss the giant box with moving pictures out a window?
However, there are times when treating the children to a new movie rental, or an old favorite can give you just enough time to have a quick date with your spouse.
You won’t even have to find a sitter.
Put It On The Calendar
If something is on the calendar it is harder to push to the side or ignore. This also has the added benefit of creating anticipation. It allows you to think about the upcoming date with the enthusiasm a date deserves.
5 Frugal and Simple Ideas for Dating Your Spouse
With that newly allotted time you have, here are a few possibilities with what you can do.
Spread a blanket on your floor, grab some crackers, cheese, and your favorite beverage; splurge on dark chocolate and seasonal fruit.
With the kids in front of a movie or sleeping, this is a simple and romantic way to reconnect with your spouse.
Lock your screens away and get to know each other again.
This is not the time to discuss “important” things. Those can wait.
Cocoa Under the Stars
One of my favorite things to do is to sit out on our porch and drink cocoa.
Now that the temperature has dropped below sauna and is feeling more like Autumn, I’m looking forward to some quality dates with my spouse and my favorite warm beverage.
Consequently, I have a nice supply of different cocoa varieties I’ve received with my subscription to Coffee and a Classic.
Luckily for me, they were willing to change it from coffee to cocoa, so I’ve been enjoying their products for the last year.
Watch a Favorite Show
Put those little loves to bed or down for a nap (since my husband works nights we have to be a lot more flexible with date times), pop some popcorn or go all out and make finger foods; then sit back and relaxed together–snuggled up of course–to catch up on all those episodes that have been waiting for you.
This of course should go without saying, but those handheld screens we’re always connected to–they need to be far, far away.
Play a Game
We have a closet full of board games and card games. I have high hopes to one day do weekly family game nights.
Right now with two kids under 6, they’re a bit hit or miss. I have goals though. We’ll get there.
Until then, these games can be utilized for date night.
It’s simple to set up and put away, and if you have a closet filled with them already–entirely free.
You can make this as simple or fancy as you’d like.
Add dinner or dessert, to add an extra dose of special to your evening playing “Clue”.
Complete a Bible Study
Since marriage is a covenant we make to each other and to God, it is important for us to stay connect to Christ as well.
There are several really great Bible studies we’ve done together in years past.
They’ve done more for us than any dinner and a movie in town could.
This doesn’t have to be one done with a group.
In fact, it would be perfect to do together in the comfort of your home, and can fit into short periods of time.
The important thing when it comes to dating your spouse, is that you’re connecting with them. You’re getting to know who they are today, because let’s face it, we’ve all changed since we said “I do.”
Selection of Bible Studies:
- You and Me Forever: Marriage in Light of Eternity–Francis Chan
- The Power of a Praying Wife–Stormie Omartian and The Power of a Praying Husband– Stormie Omartian
- gods at War: Defeating the Idols That Battle for Your Heart–Kyle Idleman
I’m not an expert on marriage or even on keeping up a great relationship with my husband. I am however, determined to rectify that. I hope these ideas help you find frugal and simple ways to date your spouse too.
Until next time,
If you enjoyed this post, please check out my article on how the military life strengthened my faith in God.
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